So we took a roadtrip. A 2,040 mile roadtrip to be exact!
UGH!!!! How many days does that take? It takes 3! 3 VERY long, hard, driving days! I suppose you could drive it much faster if you didn’t hear the infamous “I gotta go” from the back of the van every 100 miles from one of your four kids! But who the heck travels without four kids?
Would you like to hear a funny “I gotta go” story?
I figured you did! It goes like this…….
About 3/4 of the way through our 3 day trip my three year old decided she HAD to GO, and she HAD to GO NOW!!! Chicken gave in despite only being an hour down the road from the last pit stop and pulled over at a much unexpected rest area bathroom….in Texas. Ya’ll ever been to Texas? Ya’ll know how the wind blows out in Texas? Alright, so I get Nora into the bathroom and pull an elasta girl move to squeeze myself into the tiny cubicle without pushing my daughter into the water of doom….*If anyone reading this is a roadside bathroom specialist, could you please tell me why they build those dang stalls so small, and for the love of Pete, why do the doors open INTO the stall instead of to the outside? WHY??? Anyhow, Once inside the stall I began the paper laying on the toilet seat (germaphobe) and….Remember that good ‘ol Texas wind? Well, it was at this point in our little excursion that I noticed this bathroom was not completely enclosed! Yep, the same guy that hung that bathroom door also decided that a good air flow would be really nice. Seriously??? You ever tried to lay a Jenga inspired layer of paper on a toilet seat in a windstorm? I actually found myself standing on one leg and trying to hold the danged toilet paper down with the other foot. It was the most ridiculous round of Twister I have ever played! With one leg hiked up on the toilet seat and both hands holding down the rest of the paper I finally had the seat covered as my hair swirled up and over my head wildly….clearly one of my best Sexy Mama moments! I glanced over at my daughter to let her know it was now safe for her to take her seat! I’m not sure if the look on her face was one of pure terror or complete bewilderment, but with a firm shake of her head I realized she was right. This was ridiculous!! I stood up tall and helped her onto the probably cleaner than home throne, and tried to catch the possessed toilet paper that was now flying around the stall….I ain’t Messing with Texas! Feeling a bit defeated, I Climbed back into the all male van and heard the infamous question… “What took so long?”! If. they. only. knew!
It was actually a great trip and we are having a grand time in The Land of Enchantment! I’ve lots of pictures to show and stories to tell. I’ll be posting more of both in the near future! Right now though, a plate of homemade enchiladas is calling my name! “Suena la Puerta!” Learned this new phrase a few days ago…just thought I’d share in case you ever needed to tell someone to knock on the door! 🙂 You’re welcome!