One bite of this and I’m sitting in a tiny little blue kitchen in San Angelo, TX with my Maw Maw and Grandmother!  We would make the long drive to Maw Maw’s house early in the morning and make it there by lunchtime…in which she would have cooked up a storm waiting on our arrival.  Chicken fried steak, mashed potatoes and gravy, chocolate milk and either this chocolate pie or her famous chocolate cake, of which I sadly do not have the recipe!

Some of my favorite memories ever are from that tiny little Texas house.  A few that come to mind are…

1.  When my older brother was lying on the floor watching the tiny little tv one afternoon (in his short shorts mind you, this was the 80′s), and my Grandmother seeing a fly land on the back of his unsuspecting leg!  You know what’s coming next right?  She quickly grabbed the flyswatter and raised it up to the heavens, and with the force of a heavenly hand she brought that flyswatter down and  smacked the back of my brother’s leg…HaHaHaHaHa!!!!  It’s still ridiculously funny thinking about how fast he jumped off of the floor and the yelping he was managing as he flailed around!  I don’t even remember if she got the fly or not…we were all heehawing too much to remember!

2.  The fishy smell that would pour from the sink anytime you turned on the water.  I’ll never forget pulling the string in the middle of the bathroom to turn on the overhead light, and using her (Plain) Crest toothpaste to brush my teeth…..with the fishy water!

Does anyone know how to get boys to use a clothes hamper? I have one in everyones bedroom, but I walk by the boys rooms and there the dirty undies and nasty (yes NASTY) socks are laying right next to the bin! This goes for the big boy too….he likes to pile his dirties right next to the bed! If anyone has suggestions on how to remedy this problem I’m open to trying just about anything!

Does anyone know how to get your sweet little 2yr. old daughter to learn that we don’t put our friends into headlocks and drag them to the ground? Apparently the boys have been giving her WWE lessons that I didn’t know about….and poor, sweet Ellie is taking the brunt of it! Seriously…….she took her to the ground!

I’m missing my sanity….if anyone finds it, please send it back to me ASAP….the neighbors are starting to ask questions!

Does anyone know where I can get a Parent’s Guide to first grade? I’ve been helping with homework and We’ve gotten a few wrong! If you just give me a picture of an airplane that looks like it’s taking off, I might just write takeoff instead of jet……how am I supposed to know what answer you’re looking for?

Anyone know how to get rid of a ‘nasty’ couch smell? I’ve tried baking soda, fabreeze, vinegar, fabric softeners…..and it still smells like roadkill!

Here’s a couple of Hawkins funnies for ya….

Beau and Henry were eating lunch and the conversation went something like this….

Beau “You like pig, because you like bacon”!
Henry “I don’t like pig”!
Beau “Bacon is from a pig Henry”!
Henry “You’re such a liar…..Pigs are NOT crunchy”!
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Me “Who made this mess”?
Beau “Henry did it”!
Henry “It wasn’t me…I even asked the Magic 8 ball and it said ‘No’”!

My light came on….

Found out my 7 year old has been rubbing MY shower bar soap onto the shower scrubber head! Yeah, the one I scrub the shower floor with….Is it too much that I wiped down (body) with a clorox wipe soon after?

Discovered my 2yr. old has been scrubbing the sink with MY toothbrush….picture me gagging and instantly feeling ill!

Walked in on the 2yr. old rubbing her feet with her brothers deodorant stick….she claimed she needed lotion on her feet!

Walked into the basement to find it smelling like an Irish Spring…..someone decided it would be a good idea to paint the basement floor green with the stuff! Smelled really good, but was a pain in the horses rear to get up!

I was seeing red……We’re talking red hands, red face, red teeth and lips, red arms,
red tummy, red cabinets, red counter….you name it, it was red! What/Who was the culprit? Tiny red plaque tablets from the dentist (I’ll be having a conversation with him soon…he owes me at least a little laughing gas) and a 2 yr. old!

Something I Learned about myself….
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I CAN get nailed with a soccer ball while running on the treadmill and not fall off! I can also run, yell and hand out groundings all at the same time too!

Well, as much as I do love Christmas, there are a few things about Christmas I can’t quite figure out….maybe someone out there has the answers?

1. This whole Christmas tree lighting thing…..I mean really, how is it that we can put a man on the moon but we can’t make tree lights that blink the same way two days in a row? Yesterday the top half of my tree was blinking up a storm and today only one string near the bottom is flashing! This may not matter to those of you who don’t have blinking lights, but to those of us that pull out our lights and plug them in to ‘test’ them before we put them on the tree just to be sure they are working, it is more than maddening when our ‘non’blinking lights miraculously start to flash just moments after we get the entire tree adorned! WTF???????
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Get your head out of the gutter…I said What The Fudge!!!!!!

2. Since we’re talking about fudge..Anyone ever left out part of the sugar while cooking this decadent treat? NO? Well, if ever you find yourself in this situation try to refrain from adding it at the end of the process! My thought process was “how much difference could it really make if I add it now?”….Can you say “Sandy Fudge”? In my opinion, Fudge should NEVER crunch when you eat it….but that’s just me!

3. Ever start wrapping a gift and while you’re sitting on the floor trying to hold the darned paper together over your gift as you reach for the tape only to find that the tape that was just there a second ago has now vanished into thin air? That old Twister game’s got nothin on a middle aged woman crouched on the floor amid ribbons and bows with her right hand securely poised on the box to be wrapped, so as not to have the paper unravel, while she sorts through the jumbled shimmering mess for the priceless tape with her left! Santa must send elves to ‘help’ with gift wrapping! I can just imagine all the elves and Santa sitting around with cookies and cocoa in the days after Christmas watching their version of The North Pole’s Funniest videos!

4. Ever wonder if the stores are having you followed? ‘She has now purchased that giant lego set that will set her back for at least 6 months…proceed to put the lego set on sale for half price’!

5. What’s the deal with fruitcake? I’ve always heard about fruitcake at Christmas and seen/heard the many funny jokes about it…so I decided I just HAD to try one. Chicken and the boys figured I needed to try one from a local bakery…for a $20 fruitcake MUST be good right? I can honestly say that is the ONLY cake I have ever had that made my stomach turn! I tried it three different times…just to give it a fair chance..after all, it IS a cake! Bluuuaaack! So my question is….What’s the deal with fruitcake?

6. Ever buy Christmas gifts earlier in the year, then hide them so well you don’t find them until July? I’m applying for a job with the Easter bunny…my hiding skills are amazing!

7. Does it mean you’re trailer trash if you decide to decorate your kids ugly playslide out front verses just putting it away for the winter?

8. Why does the post office not have a drive thru? Again with the funny videos as I try to balance a giant box on one hip as I hold a 2 year old in the other as I make my way across a busy parking lot…for once I am thanking The Good Lord for these big hips!

Seriously, I love the Holidays and look forward to them every year! It’s just a bonus that come January and the Holiday decorations are put away, that my house grows bigger in size! Ya’ll know what I’m talking about? Hallelujah!

It was really simple to do. I just drew on a few buildings, colored them in, then painted over them with a decoupage glue! *The glue was just so it would be a little more waterproof/sturdier!

Now cruz can drive his Tonka cars to the bakery..

The pizzeria, or back home to a ‘Sesame Street’ like Apartment home!

I think this would make a fabulous storage container for all sorts of on-the-go toys! I may just have to make up some more for Nora and keep them in the car for soccer games this Spring!

Hope ya’ll are having fun with the Holidays!

The dolls have a velcro circle sewn on as do the dresses, that way Nora can change their clothes very easily! I also put velcro on the inside of the tin lid to serve as a hanger for the dresses!

I also sewed a small bed to tuck the girls into when done playing for safe keeping in the tin!

Yes, I used another cute cookie tin for storing these dolls….and NO, I didn’t eat all those cookies too….Not yet anyway! *C’mon, ya’ll know Mama’s have a secret cookie stash that only comes out when the kiddos are in bed…..right?

Materials needed for this are felt/fabric, velcro strips or dots, a marker (face) and imagination! I drew up my own pattern for both the dolls and the dresses, but I’m sure you could print and trace a pattern very easily!

Hope you’re enjoying seeing what I’ve been up to lately in the crafting department! Next up……..toy car storage from an oatmeal canister!

All it takes to make them is popsicle sticks, markers/colored pencils, and washi tape!

I wanted these to stand up so Nora could play with them in her doll house,the one she’s been asking Santa for, so I used those little hanging paper clips! *I did cut & remove the hanger first!

The fact that I had to buy and eat a box of cookies to make the girl’s their storage tin was just a bonus! *I decorated the inside of the tin by gluing pages from a Pottery Barn magazine!

As cute as these are, the next post just might be cuter! Girls are so much fun!

Well, first of all the Pilgrims came over on the “Mainflower” not the Mayflower!  After asking why they came here in the first place I was told “it was just too boring in England”!  Now here’s a tidbit I KNOW you’ve never heard before…They knew they had arrived at their destination because the rock they stepped on had a sign that said “Plymouth Rock”! (Remember the video?) I’m still chuckling over that one!

Ok, so when asked what happened when they got here the response was “Well, basically they all died…..from Sea Sickness”!  When asked what happened to the rest of them he replied “Some of them got killed by animals when they were trying to get their fur”.  What kind of animals?  ”Well, like foxes and stuff”!   Do you know how hard it is to keep a straight face when getting info. like this?  

I learned a couple of new tidbits about the pilgrims daily life too, such as they lived in stick houses and had to mop after it rained, and because they didn’t have bathrooms they had to pee in cups like little Gatorade bottles!  Again with the straight face…….so hard!

I bet you never knew the first indian the pilgrims met was actually Quanto…not Squanto as previously thought!

I asked several more questions that went something like this….

Q- “Would you have sailed on the ‘Mainflower’? A- “No, it would be too boring & you’d get seasick”!

Q- “If you were a pilgrim would you have been scared of the indians”?  A- “Yes, because of their feathers and bow & arrows..duh”!

Q- “If you were an indian would you have been scared of the pilgrims?  A- “No because they don’t look scary…..they look old”!

Q- “What do you think is the best part of Thanksgiving”? A- “Eating sweet potatoes and fighting for the ‘turkey bone’.  You get wished on if you get the longest piece”!

And last but not least…

Henry’s idea of the meaning of Thanksgiving….  ”Something you’re Thankful for and you do it by celebrating”!

And that my friends is how the pilgrims really got here and how Thanksgiving came to be.  After all…..he watched a video!

YES, IT’S TRUE ….CHILDREN SUCK YOUR BRAINS OUT!

Ok…so just for your future reference, here are a few things I’ve learned, that as a parent, you shouldn’t worry so much about….it’s gonna be ok….even if it HURTS for a bit!!

For starters…

Breaking open glow in the dark sticks with your mouth will NOT do much more damage than make your face glow for a few hours!

Ingesting TNT, the glow snake 4th of July kind, will only need to be washed down with 2-3 bottles of gatorade or water!

Then there’s the…

Dropping the canister part of the vacuum down the stairs at your child while they are standing below you is Not always as bad as you would think…they bounce back rather quickly…they hold grudges, but they bounce back nonetheless!

Closing the van door with your new swanky remote control key, while their hand is still in the door, only causes total chaos for a few brief moments….again, the grudges tend to be the worst part of this little accident!

Your child pitching a fit and holding their breath until they pass out is perfectly OK…Just look at it as some well earned ‘Mommy’ quiet time!

Giving them cereal with milk…and later learning said milk was…hold on to your seats….CHUNKY……OK, I agree, this one is as bad as it sounds!!!!

Whacking the back of their head on brick steps, and losing eyesight for a bit, is usually diagnosed as a mild concussion…Usually the only prescribed meds here are strong liquors for Mom! *I’m just kidding about the liquor, I think….please don’t send Bad Mommy mail!

Your child putting his head through a hole that has seemingly gotten smaller since insertion can usually be remedied after taking several pictures and then removing banister railings to free them….don’t bother fixing the banister, this will Not be the last time you encounter this little fix!

When playing football with your kids outside and one of them face plants on the back bumper of your jeep, it’s usually best not to tell them how quickly their eye is turning black…instead, tell them it’s too bad you didn’t get it on video because it was so good you could win $1,000 on America’s Funniest Home Videos!

And last but not least,

When giving your newborn a sink bath on the countertop, don’t worry too much about that permanent mark you left on their chubby little leg when you were accidentally leaning against it…just look at it as a little ‘motherly branding’!

Why this long trek? Well, my sister FINALLY got married and I was her Maid of Honor…..that and we hadn’t been back home to New Mexico in 2 years, and since we don’t own a private plane, and we don’t have thousands of dollars just sitting around for 6 plane tickets, we made the 4 day drive with 4 kids!

WITH…

FOUR…

KIDS!!!

Do you know what 4 kids sound like in a small hotel room after 10 hours of travel? All I can say is we’re lucky we weren’t sent back to the road! I suppose the hotels really don’t mind if the kids ‘try out’ the furniture…after all, why else would they have two beds and a couch so close to each other? First one to touch the floor loses!!!

And as far as the free breakfast is concerned….good for us, BAD for the hotel! The kids see muffins..FREE, cereal..FREE, waffles…FREE, eggs and bacon…FREE….It’s like a kids dream come true…anything you want, AND IT”S FREE!! Needless to say, we most definitely left our mark every morning!

Some tid-bits for your funny bone…

After being seated at a restaurant and served our drinks, Nora decided she needed a water to go with her milk. I told her we would have to wait for the guy to come back and then ask him for one. The next thing I know she had spotted our waiter and very loudly hollers above the noise “Guy..water please”!

Imagine me in my Maid of Honor dress the morning of the wedding…imagine me trying to bathe my sister’s feverish 3 year old..in that dress. Imagine me seeing my sister’s 14 month old playing in the toilet as I washed the 3 year old..in that dress. Imagine the 14 month old grabbing my glitzy belt and popping the closure right off of that dress as I tried to grab the little bugger and clean him up!
Note to self….Remove all glam-clothing before trying to deal with children! *As if I’ll be wearing ‘glam’ clothing anytime soon!

Picture this….My Henry streaking buck naked through a house full of people because his swimming trunks were drying outside instead of in the room he stripped his clothing in! His response? “It’s ok, nobody saw me because I ran really fast”!

Another funny Henry story….

Chicken has a large family and my kids have a hard time remembering everyone’s names, so….

Henry was trying to get one of his cousins attention and since she was wearing a TEXAS shirt he yells out “Hey Texas”..which DID get her attention! Later that night Henry again couldn’t remember her name so he calls out “Hey Texas” again, to which she replies “That’s not my name. What is my name?” He then gets close to her and in a hushed voice says “Well, don’t tell anybody, but you’re so cute you could be the King of Texas!” My 6 year old throwing lines like that….I’m so gonna be in trouble one day!

Hope you’re all having a great summer making fun memories of your own!!!

Wedding reception photo booth’s are sooo much fun!!!

Like them?

Nora was outgrowing her shirts and I couldn’t find any cute..cheap…dresses for her, so I used leftover fabric to make these scrap dresses!

I also made the little fabric braided necklaces too…because girls just love accessories!

I thought about selling these on ETSY…

What? You’d be interested in them?

Well…..

It wont be happening anytime soon because my sewing machine got hungry and ate the latest dress! I don’t know what went wrong…I cleaned and oiled and the dang thing is definitely upset about something….and it wont tell me what the heck it is!!! I really hate this ugly game of ‘I’ll do something ridiculous and you try to guess what it is’…honest to goodness my free time is slim to none around here and pleading with a machine is not really how I’d like to spend it! I’m wondering now if it’s better…cheaper…to buy a new one versus bringing this one in for repair? It is a Brother 1520 and only a few years old, but I’ve read that repair can cost around $50, nearly half what a new one would cost…and I’ve also read that this happens quite often on these lower priced machines! UGH! I just wanted to be able to make things for Nora and small projects for the home…why can’t a machine, whose sole purpose it is to sew, sew??? It’s not really asking too much is it?

Oh well, I’m sure I’ll figure something out!
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I’m still giddy I was actually able to sew something that is wearable!